Sunday, July 03, 2011

Men Will Be Men



So I was browsing through a social networking site just now and saw a girl younger to me (I'm 22 years old btw), who has probably also worked in some recent acting productions, married. I'm not judging.


She was tagged in a photo that had the picture of a girl smoking (it was NOT her picture). There were some comments on that picture. One of them was from a lady and went like this: What a shameless girl! chi!. The other comment from a man, was a bit more specific: Girl der choritroi ata.mayra sob e pare.ader choritror kono level nai.. . . . . . . ("This is the character of girls, they can do anything. They have no level at all......." ). I am not judging. 


By virtue of interest, I clicked on the man's profile. His favorite singers include Shakira, Eminem and Avril Lavigne. His favorite movies include Tomb Raider, Transformers and The Dark Knight. I also clicked on the lady's profile. I did not find any 'interests' mentioned on her profile except that in the part of Favorite Quotations was written this: "Don't ask for my phone number. I'll not give it to you." Interesting.


I learnt that she was in her first year of graduation and was already engaged. The man, I don't know whether he is married or not, but he had a profile pic with a little girl. I wouldn't be too surprised if he turned out married as well.


Now gentle readers might ask me what's the point of all this.


Truth is I don't know. I have half a mind to put the links here so that you can drop by and send the man and woman in question, a short message, asking what it is that they truly believe in. The woman's case seems to be pretty simple. She has conservative values, which explains why she is already engaged in the first year of college.


The man's scenario, I find amusing. One wonders what his values are when he sees Angelina Jolie smoking onscreen. And not to mention the steamy Megan Fox in Transformers. Let's just be honest, Megan Fox is the best thing to happen in Transformers


But I'm pretty sure, the man does not watch those movies to see the seductive Angelina Jolie or the steamy Megan Fox. He watches those movies purely because of the "Good Vs Evil" wars they portray. After all, that's why he even likes Milla Jovovich in Resident Evil..Oops, he does not like her, he just likes her "action".



  


Critics will always say a lot of things; they will always be cynical towards his good intentions. And even if he (like a lot of other men) likes to watch those beautiful scantily clad girls throwing their shapely limbs up and down, what's wrong with it? They are foreigners; they can do anything. In fact, the less clad they are, the better. ;)

But that does not mean that girls of our homes will go on and start doing those things! Oh No! That would be a sacrilege! I mean a girl smoking, how atrocious is that?! And not because smoking is a harmful habit which is dangerous to both men and women and all those who inhale the smoke. It is atrocious because it is a girl who is smoking! I mean, can you imagine that?? It's alright for a man to smoke, it's alright for a man to pass lewd comments about women on the street even if she is covered from head to toe, it is alright for a man to beat up his women; he's a MAN. He can do anything. God Almighty has given him the full right to do as he pleases, with women, with children, with even other species. 



A fellow trainee likes to smoke. She has about 5-6 cigarettes everyday. She hears quite a bit of lecture for her unhealthy habit from me. Everyday during break, we go out to search for relevant shops in the area and she takes this time to smoke. I can't stand the fumes, so I stand away, while she smokes to her heart's content. The area is a predominantly official area with a lot of office-goers (read: men) around. All shapes and sizes of men ranging from your average rickshawallah to the elderly businessman pass by. They look at her; I look at them. Desire, a rowdy oppressiveness characterized by a sly smile adorn them as they pass by. Some of them even take their time to stop by and gaze at her as if she's a new species at the zoo. I mean, what kind of girls smoke? The 'bad' girls right? If a girl can smoke, then she can do anything. Yes, that's right. Anything


If a girl smokes, it means she is cheap and easily available. She is ready to sleep with anyone, be it a roadside rickshawallah or a sex starved 50 something elderly businessman. She is very 'open', you know. 




But what if a girl is not smoking? What if let's say, she's wearing full length clothes? I see 70 year old rich men pass by and give her a quick glance of desire. Lust. There is nothing fatherly or even the least conservative about their glance. And I am shocked. Because these are rich men, well one assumes they are educated, experienced in the ways of the world, one assumes that since they are old and on their way to the grave, they will treat girls of their grand daughters' age as such. 


But silly me. It's always the girl's fault, didn't you know? 


It's raining heavily. I am fully wet by the time I reach the bus station from my home. On my way to office. Water dripping, there is nothing attractive about me. At least I don't feel so. I am like a waterfall. I feel like a cartoon. Irritated. I hate rains. And I notice a man beside me, an old man, but this time, from the lower sections of the society, staring at me, as if he would gulp me down, if he could. 


And frankly, I don't know what to make of it. I mean I am used to lewd comments, unabashed gazes on streets but when it's a calamity, the least you would expect of everyone is to mind their business. But c'mon, how could that stop him from gazing at me, at my body, more specifically? I could be even more specific but then my gentle readers would not be able to take it. Some of those gentle readers include well educated men who talk idealistically of equality between sexes. :)

I never get over it. Always mind my surroundings. What to wear, where I am going. After dark hours. Scares me. I also have a cause of suffocation, which means that I cannot be huddled in crowded spaces.But crowded buses, shuttles, often a tired traveler sits close to me, with hands dangerously close and nowhere to escape. I gasp for a breath of air. 



But c'mon men do this. Don't they do hard work everyday just for the sake of their family, this economy? If they are a bit comfortable with their hands on you, let them do it. After all, they are not raping you. Always remember, you are a woman. You have to mind your surroundings. Men will be men. They are biologically programmed this way. 


And this is the crux of all education. No matter how educated you are, no matter how many degrees you have, somewhere down the line, you will find these degrees fail. Which line is that? The line of sex.Your MBA degree is not going to save you from getting raped at night. It doesn't matter how compassionate a social worker you are, it is not going to stop lewd comments from getting at you.




At this rate, my highly educated idealistic friends would scream up, 'But.. but there are women too...'. Yes there are women who have been molded by this overwhelming suffocating obnoxious system of patriarchy. Women who think it's the girl's fault if the man touches her. But who's fault is that?


And now my intellectual friends will give examples from Raja Rammohun Roy and Vidyasagar who were the first ones to campaign for women's rights in India. I don't contest that. All Good.


But strangely, I don't get to see many Rammohuns and Vidyasagars every day that I travel. Or even generally. May be it's my fault. I've got a girl's brains you see. Girls are by nature a bit stupid and irrational. Hope you will excuse me for that. :)

And how many of these high flying scholars have been teased by the lustful glances of men? Er..Okay, Women? 



At least 1 woman?


No? 
Then Shut Up. :)


P.S: Like the pictures? ;)


P.P.S: Here's a raunchy link I found on hot female cartoons. The best part? The writer is kind enough to offer his expert opinion on what women/gay men would like as well : 

http://www.cracked.com/blog/mommy-im-confused-10-women-from-80s-cartoons-that-ushered-us-into-manhood/

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

OMG when I saw the pictures *gasps puts hand over mouth* LOL

Subhrashis Adhikari said...

strong post... unfortunately i cannot disagree...
these 'men' do not leave guys as well...i am sure there are many men who have been molested by men as a kid, but their ego would not let them confess it...

Cheers!
SUB

Trisha said...

@Emmy: :)

@SUB: Thanks for bringing such an important point to notice. Child Sexual Abuse truly is an alarming incident in the world and each year, the number of reported cases in India continue to rise. And quite rightly it is said, "The Abused becomes the Abuser" in later life..

Sairam said...

long but hard hitting post.
got to agree with the example of smoking woman.

Tripthi Battapadi said...

Hahahah!!
"Don't ask for my phone number. I'll not give it to you."


:))))