The Song of Love

I

I was waiting for you Susana. I was standing in the rain, looking at the leaves. The water dripping over the new leaves. The glistening green. The first rains of the season. I waited. For you. I didn't need anybody else if you were with me Susana. You, I loved you. You were the sole reason of my existence, the sole harbinger of my happiness. I remembered you. You and I.... we were meant to be together. Forever. I am still waiting...

"Sir", the voice broke his day dreams. He looked up. It was their family servant. "Ma'am is asking whether you are joining her for dinner or not."

"Tell her I'm not hungry". He looked down, overcome by the sudden water in his eyes. He got a call. The voice on the other side sounded rough. He answered, cold and confident. "I don't care... when will they pay the money?...Good. Get the full money. And then..shoot them." He put his phone down.

II

The first time I saw you. That was the first time I fell in love. I did not think you would even look at me. But you did. I was overjoyed. You and Me....that was how life was supposed to be. We got married in a hurry. And all this timeI thought, it was because you couldn't wait to be with me....It was because you loved me. I smiled coz of you....But now.

Sitting at the breakfast table, she was thinking. The servant came and informed her that the master would not be coming. "Not hungry?" She smiled pitifully at him. "Fine. Take away the dishes". 

"But Ma'am...", the old servant who was too old not to notice the subtleties of the people in the empty house  protested meekly.

"Don't worry, I'll be fine", she smiled and left. She went to her room and watched out the window. It had begun to rain. The raindrops flowed against the smooth glass. Her hands on the glass, she desperately tried to break free.

III

I nestled in your warm breasts. Even when he beat you. The warm nest that you made with your hands. The safest place. He wouldn't be able to hurt me there. You and I..... I, in the shadow of you......Nursed with your milk, your kindness. How could you leave me? Even when he came that day, I hid into my nest. But you...there was nothing to save you. I couldn't protect you even though you had protected me all life! He left. And I sat near you. Calling you. Asking you to wake up. But you never did. I am still waiting for you to wake up....

He came near her. She sat up. "I...thought you were sleeping", he chose his words carefully. 

"Why are you here?" She asked with a  lifelessness in her voice.

His voice shivered. He couldn't speak. "I...I came to see how you were doing."

"I am fine. Go away." She remained cold.

He went towards the small window beside her bed. The rain was still falling. "I was thinking today," he said quietly, "do you remember we used to have so much fun during rainfall? Whenever the first rains came, we would run out into the vast green plains and get wet. There was no stopping us." His eyes looked in the distance, beyond the glass, the water, even beyond the horizon, desperately searching for those innocence-filled days.

Her eyes flickered. 

"Where were you? And why are you so wet Susana?" A stern voice asked.

"Papi, I'm sorry", the little girl replied scared. "I got wet."

The sturdy figure gave out a hearty laugh. "Come here my little girl", Susana approached fearfully. Her father picked her up in his arms, "My little girl....don't you realize that if you get wet, you will fall sick? Now quick..." He put her down. "Go inside and ask your mother to come", he replied smilingly. 

Her mother was stitching. "Mami, Papi's calling you", the little girl cheerfully informed. Her mother was deeply engrossed in the needlework; she pricked her fingers. Generous blood oozed out.....

Susana stared. The cries of her mother echoed through her. 

"....and if you need anything," He was trying to say, desperately trying to make his voice heard, the kind he had done for the past fifteen years, "Just tell the nurse". He smiled. "See you Susana". And he left.

The rain was still flowing.

Somewhere a woman stood, in the rain, waiting for her love to return…

P.S: I am profoundly indebted to the brilliant novel Pedro Paramo by Juan Rulfo for this piece.